notes i found in my cousin’s diary
by CHINUA EZENWA-OHAETO
a. sometimes i do not call things
by their names; i do not want them
to lose what they have― power.
b. my hate has never
stood in the nude
before a woman.
c. in some nights my father screams in my dream.
he tells me the day deserves to know he survived it.
in some evenings, my friend takes me to the balcony for smoking:
rings of our puffs dangle above our heads like halos.
and we touch them to see our sadness heal for a moment.
d. my sister does not use god’s name
anymore. what is god if not my pains, she says to me.
and her thighs are stitched portrait riddled by half-moons.
she once picked up love at the backyard after a boy
dropped it while fetching a bucket of water.
e. i like seeing the highlight of Lewandowski
scoring five goals in nine minutes; it helps
me forget an exam i failed in two hours.
f. my mother says there are holes inside everyone,
that we leak, that nothing becomes whole without openings.
by CHINUA EZENWA-OHAETO
a. sometimes i do not call things
by their names; i do not want them
to lose what they have― power.
b. my hate has never
stood in the nude
before a woman.
c. in some nights my father screams in my dream.
he tells me the day deserves to know he survived it.
in some evenings, my friend takes me to the balcony for smoking:
rings of our puffs dangle above our heads like halos.
and we touch them to see our sadness heal for a moment.
d. my sister does not use god’s name
anymore. what is god if not my pains, she says to me.
and her thighs are stitched portrait riddled by half-moons.
she once picked up love at the backyard after a boy
dropped it while fetching a bucket of water.
e. i like seeing the highlight of Lewandowski
scoring five goals in nine minutes; it helps
me forget an exam i failed in two hours.
f. my mother says there are holes inside everyone,
that we leak, that nothing becomes whole without openings.
Chinua Ezenwa-Ohaeto (@ChinuaEzenwa) is from Owerri-Nkworji in Nkwerre, Imo state, Nigeria and grew up between Germany and Nigeria. And always grateful to the poets who have influenced him. His works have appeared in Lunaris Review, AFREADA, Poet Lore, Rush Magazine, Frontier, Palette, Malahat review, Southword Magazine, Vallum, Mud Season Review, Bakwa Magazine, Salamander, Strange Horizons, One, Ake Review, Crannòg magazine and elsewhere.